...... for the torture in my brains to go away. I think this has been the 2nd straight solid week now of continuous brain zaps. At this point, it feels like they will never go away. I was really hoping that they'd become less frequent by the end of the week. Work was good one day this week but the other 3 were stressful and full of brain zaps. I've been sitting with a new hire for the past 2 days straight. She's the new onsite for our other client. But unfortunately, she's the 2nd attempt. The first one was great! She was real nice and we got along pretty good. BUT she managed to fail her drug screen - figures. Turns out she was with friends within the last few weeks and smoked a joint. So my boss quickly lines up new interviews and hired a new person within 1 day and had her sitting with me the next. The new one is very different - older, mother-like. It wasn't long before she was trying to help me do my job. I drove us to get our drug screens done for the other client today and I felt like the worst driver with her over there freaking out and telling me which lane to be in. By the end of the day today, I had pretty much checked out mentally. Having someone sit by you and watch you work and you having to talk to them and you're trying to explain what you're doing is pretty exhausting.
I found myself thinking all the way home that it was this kind of day that makes me really wish I wasn't single and coming home to a cat. A massage and great conversation would have been wonderful.
The other main side effect of withdrawing from the Zoloft, besides zaps and irritability - is the extreme emotions. EVERYTHING is making me cry. Its not a depressed cry - just all these emotions I'm not used to feeling about EVERYTHING. I'm crying when I feel happy about something, when I see a commercial or something on TV, a song on the radio. I'm surprised I've made it through the workdays without crying.
My verse of the week has to be Psalm 54:2 "O God, hear my prayer; give ear to the words of my mouth." (ESV)
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